In the global community that we live in, it’s becoming more and more common that we find someone who is different from us that we have a connection to. The question becomes, what do we do when we are faced with this situation? Religion is the foundation of many of our lives, so when you and your significant other differ, it can feel like you’re all alone in your own personal crusade. So what is a person to do?

Talk To Your Partner

Many people label themselves a certain way (Catholic, Muslim, Buddhist, etc.) but their beliefs deviate from the mainstream of these religions. Agree with your partner to have an open discussion, no conversion pressure, just a simple informational conversation, this is what I believe, what do you believe. Try not to label yourself, just put it all out there.

Research

Don’t denounce your honey’s religion when all you know are the shallow facts. Research the foundations; non-biased sites like BBC Religion & Ethics can help point you in the right direction. Many times if you Google [the religion] vocabulary, you can find lists of commonly used words they could clear things up for you. Also, if your sweetie follows an Abrahmic faith (any religion who claims Abraham as significant part of their history) and you follow another; do not expect to automatically understand the history and significance, or the names for that matter. There are many websites targeted to converts that you can use to your advantage in translating seemingly foreign names into names your familiar with.

Separate Religion From Culture

Often culture and religion are mashed together in a horrific car crash of misunderstanding. What are really the teachings of the holy text or guru and what are the everyday practices of that people? If you and your dearest can’t separate it, never fear, the internet is here! Research the region of your other half and compare it to the teachings or contact a learned person within this religion (again, the internet can be your best resource to finding a house of worship within your area) to get their opinion.

Avoid Conversion Pressure

While finding out about your partner’s religion can be an exciting experience that can bring the two of you together, do not give in to conversion to appease your other half or stop the arguing. If you are converting just to appease someone else, what are the chances you are going to want to stick with it when times get tough? Only convert when you think it is truly the best expression of your beliefs and that it is something you will stay with.

For anyone facing the difficult task of being in an interfaith relationship, the key is to keep an even temper and a calm head. This can be a touchy issue for everyone involved, so if the discussion gets too heated, step back and take a minute to recoup. Good luck to you all.