The Good: Going to the dentist is uncomfortable. Thankfully years ago Novocaine was created to help make the dentist less uncomfortable. Now, given my last dental procedure (getting some teeth pulled) was eight years ago, the lovely effects of this pain killer are not quite fresh in my mind. Despite this, I am sure many of you know that Novocaine, while an effective pain reliever, can leave your lips, gums, and tongue numb long after the actual procedure you are experiencing.

Familiar with the byproducts of Novocaine, Novalar Pharmaceuticals created a new wonder drug to remove the after effects of Novocaine. The drug, OraVerse, has been approved by the FDA and worked effectively in clinical trials on women and children. OraVerse isn’t for intravenous use, but has very few complications if injected into the gums.

Ambiguous News: I don’t know if this is a victory for the people or a loss for organized religion, hence why this is ambiguous news. A small Baptist church in Snellville, Georgia is advertising free gas for its parishioners. The sign posted outside the church, stating “Free Gasoline”, has led to swarms of calls inquiring to the catch. The catch is this, parishioners and newcomers receive a pink raffle ticket when they attend a church event between Sunday and Wednesday. These tickets are then entered into a raffle for two $500 gas cards. The ministers of the small church compare this to door-to-door revelations, and hope that this promotion will help bring troubled Americans back to the church. What do you think?